Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
