My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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