Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
