Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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