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OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
