bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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