Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
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