I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
A+ Viking dick
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
