in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize