Walk of Shame. In a state park.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
