I wanna bring you to show and tell
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
