Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
