what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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