i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
