i need an iv and a liver transplant
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
