so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
