Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
