I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
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