Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize
