it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
