The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
