He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
