Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
