But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Randomize
