Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
