Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
