Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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