turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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