So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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