And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
