As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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