your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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