how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
