Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
