can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
