No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
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