It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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