He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
