dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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