I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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