Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
