great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
