perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
i think my cat just said my name.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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