I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
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