He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
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