Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
