Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Randomize
