I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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