saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
