i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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